Growing Up!

You know, it occurred to me yesterday what all these changes are in my relationship with Jeremiah... He's just growing up. It sounds so simple, I know, but as a first time mom it's hard to move out of that baby stage!

But he's not a baby anymore. He's not my baby. I don't feel this overwhelming urge to protect him from the world. He's almost two, and he's a big boy, and I've been feeling a little differently about things lately. I've been wanting him to experience things. If he gets hurt, that's okay (as long as it's within limits, of course!). If he gets his feelings hurt, it's not the end of the world. If he cries when I put him in time-out, so be it. If he whines when I tell him "No", the world won't end.

It's like I've shifted from protecting him from the world, and now my job is to help him learn how to navigate in this world. To give him enough space to make mistakes and learn, but still keep him safe enough. What a big transition for me! I've felt secretly guilty, like I love him less or something, but now I understand that my job as his mother is changing, and that our relationship is growing up right along with him.

But it's hard to let go! And oh-my-goodness, I love that kid. Not less than I did 20 months ago when he was born, but definitely different. And I have so much more respect for motherhood - only moms know what love feels like, I think. In all of the different facets and stages. How love can be different and still okay. How it's not measured as much in quantity, or even quality - maybe more in durability! How much love it takes to make him sit in time-out, even when he's crying big tears and calling out my name... How a hug and a kiss and a smile from him can warm me up from the inside out... How all I want at the end of a the day is a sticky, dirty hand holding mine as he asks me to "READ book... one more... PEAS!" (translation: I know I have your heart wrapped around mine... especially when I say "peas"!).

What a blessing, what a miracle from the Lord. Words could never express the depths of my gratitude to God for giving me this little boy - my miracle. And I'm starting to glimpse how wonderful this journey is going to be! Things have already changed so much, and we have another lifetime to go! I just pray that God will keep reminding me to treasure every single second of my time with him, because it's passing so, so quick - and I pray, too, for the strength to keep up and finish the race. To keep working hard at being a good mom and raising him up to be a man of God. It will be here before I know it! (And you know what? I think a part of me will always feel that he's my little booger bear - but don't tell him that!).

Jeremiah - Mommy loves you BUNCHES!!!!

I LOVE Being His Mom!!

It has been a LONG time since I've posted, and what can I say? Life as a Mommy gets pretty hectic!

But I just wanted to tell everyone what a WONDERFUL little boy I have! He is so cute, so smart, so funny, so social, so perfect!

We discovered elbows today. We were playing our game where he points to Mommy's eyes, then Jeremiah's eyes; Mommy's ears, Jeremiah's ears; Mommy's toes, Jeremiah's toes. I was trying to think of something he didn't know yet, so I asked him to find his elbows. He looked really confused, and started looking around on his body, pointing to his leg, then his belly. I asked him again to find his elbow, and he thought some more and then got really excited and started rocking back and forth, like the boat (the boat goes "rock, rock" on the water). Apparently "boat" and "elbow" sound a lot alike! So I finally showed him my elbows, and then he tried and tried to look at his own elbows, which was SO cute! Since he couldn't see them too good, we went on a hunt for all the elbows we could find. We saw the dog's elbows, and Nana's elbows, and Mommy's elbows, and Jeremiah's elbows... Oh my goodness, SO MUCH FUN!!

I never knew being a mom would be this great. Tiring, yes. Frustrating, you bet! But worth it? So, so, so, so, SO worth it! Beyond worth it! The worst day with him is a hundred thousand times better than the best day without him, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart!

We were at Walmart a few days ago, and Nana was having Jeremiah try on shoes. She pulled these silly-looking plastic batman shoes off of the shelf, and I said flat out, "I'm not spending eight dollars on those stupid things." Well, wouldn't you know, Jeremiah tried them on and loved them. He looked up at me with these eyes that just melted my heart - I've never spent eight dollars so happily in my entire life. Oh, what I wouldn't do for that kid! Suddenly I saw my life savings flash before my eyes, an endless string of batman shoes and balls and bubbles and annoying singing Elmo's... Okay, that may be a little extreme - but if you could've seen his eyes! :-)

Yes, Mommy is smitten. Mommy's IN LOVE! For the first time in my life, I'm head over heels. Boy oh boy, they never told me that motherhood was so intoxicatingly, wonderfully, frustratingly, amazingly WONDERFUL!

This summer it's my goal to take him somewhere special every single week. We went to the zoo a few weeks ago, and it was the cutest thing ever. His favorite animal was the Gorilla, I think. They were right in front of the glass, and he was just amazed. He kept looking around and seeing all the other people standing there, and would catch their attention and then point to the Gorillas. Like he was the tour guide, and had to point out the huge animals sitting right in front of the glass. And of course everyone made such a huge deal about it - no one can pass up a chance to pay attention to him.

I just can't believe he's almost a year and a half old! Where has the time gone? I look at him and just want to laugh and cry all at once. I want to hold him like a baby and never let go; I want to encourage his Independence and enjoy the little boy he's becoming. I guess that's the trick to parenting: for each stage that the child is going through, the mom is right there along for the ride. Toddlerhood isn't just rough on him, with all the changing from a baby to a child - it's rough on me, too! I'm all a mess, wanting to hold on and let go, all at the same time - just like he's not sure if he wants me to carry him or let him walk all by himself. But at the end of the day, when he's sleeping so hard, arms and legs sprawled out and taking up most of the king-sized bed, I have to lean down close and whisper to him how much I love him, how grateful I am for him, and how much fun I've had that day, just being his mom!

13 Months & Counting!

I can't believe my little man is so big! And getting so smart about things!

Yesterday he got a washcloth out of the clean laundry on the couch and started "cleaning" the floor with it. Then he found a lotion bottle and pretended to squirt it on his leg and then rub it in. It makes me look at him and wonder how on earth he knows all of this stuff! It's kind of scary how much his little brain absorbs.

Anyway - his favorite things right now:

--Dontae (our big Rottweiler) - he'll sit beside that dog for HOURS just playing so happily. Jeremiah climbs all over him, sits in his lap, and shares his food with the dog. So, so sweet!

--Baby goats. We had one that we were bottle feeding for about a week or so, and he LOVED that! She got missing in the yard one day, so now there's just the goats outside with their mommies, and he can't understand why they don't want to come play with him like Sophie did!

--His kitchen set in the barn, complete with little metal pots and pans that Nana bought for him.

--Eating. This week it's been goldfish and blueberries. Go figure! If you ask him "are you hungry?" He'll drop whatever he's doing and go immediately to the high chair and try to climb in! So cute!

--Being outside. Anything outside. He'll play on the deck for hours, or walk around the yard, or chase the chickens, or climb the wood pile, or play with the rocks and sand in the driveway... We spend A LOT of time outside! (I just asked Nana what Jeremiah's favorite things were, and she said "being outside, being outside, and being outside!")

He's so busy walking and running and climbing on everything. I can barely keep up! I find myself wanting to spend time with him like I used to - just being with him, holding him, rocking him, cuddling him close as we read books together - but then I have to remind myself that he's in a different place now! He's got his own agenda these days!

Now he's all about being busy. Climbing on everything, like I said. Doing the things he wants, and doing them by himself. He really doesn't need his mommy playing with him all the time. Sometimes he's okay just playing by himself. Imagine that?!?! :-)

One Great Year & One Great Kid!!

My goodness, how time flies! Can you believe that he's a year old? I sure can't!!

This has been the BEST year of my life! And I'm not kidding! I have never been happier. I feel so grateful that he's my son, and so honored with the privilege of raising him. Watching him grow and change is such a miracle - every single day is like unwrapping another present from God! I just can't say enough about how happy he makes me!

He's running all over now. Climbing on everything (he has learned not to jump off head first, though!). He's a little daredevil, and can play for hours by himself (not that he gets that chance often - Nana and I can't not pay attention to him!). This morning he ate yogurt out of a bowl all by himself - he dipped in his little spoon and managed to get most of it to his mouth. Just AMAZING!!

I was looking at the developmental stages of toddlerhood, and I can proudly say that he was already doing everything on the list of 13-15 month-olds, and already some of the things on the 16-18 month list! Mommy's smart little cookie!! :-)

He's talking a little, when he wants to. He can say:

• Hey


• Bye-Bye


• Up


• Nana


• Mama(it actually comes out as mamamama, but you know!)


• Moo (what the cow says)


• DooDo (This is my personal favorite! It's what the rooster says: Cockle-Doodle-Do)


• Yes (okay, he doesn't actually say yes - but he says Mm while bobbing his head forward, like you would sound if you were holding something in your mouth and trying to say yes to someone. And he says it at the right times: like "are you hungry?" "Mm (with the head bob)". So cute!)

And he can say a lot without talking! Like "read a book to me - NOW!" and "I want the boob - NOW!"

He's just delightful! So, so, so, so, SO delightful! What a great year!!

He's Walking!!!

I missed writing his nine month update! I hate it, because I love looking back over the posts and remembering what he was doing at any given month. But what can I say? Our life got a little crazy... No use crying over spilt milk, right? So here we go for this month's news:

HE'S WALKING!!!!!!

I can not tell you how amazing that is! He started taking a few shuffling steps (as he was falling) at about 9 1/2 months, and then the week before his 10-month birthday he took a few steps on purpose! We were at grandma's house, and he was unloading the tupperware cabinet, and wanted to take a lid to his John Deere tractor - he looked, he thought, and then he did it - it was 3 steps, and he made it to the tractor still standing. I was in shock! I even said - "Oh my God, he just walked" - I said it before it hit me, because hearing it made me tear up. But I didn't cry! I did good :-)

It's been about 2 weeks, and he's walking, walking, walking. He can make it all the way across our living room at home (which is HUGE). He can stop, pick up a toy, stand up, and keep going. When he wants to get somewhere, he tries walking first. I can get him to hold onto my pinky finger, and he'll walk forever - from the kitchen into the bedroom and back. It's just the craziest thing - this little baby, walking! I am so proud of him!!

He's also starting to talk. His first word was "Bye Bye". He said it about 3 weeks ago when we were getting in the car from aunt Mona's house, and she was on the porch waving bye to him. He said it again a few days later, and a few times since - clear as can be! He also says "mamamama" when he wants me, and "nananana" when he wants Nana. He doesn't have the right number of syllables, but he gets the idea!

He can wave, and clap, and he plays games. The other day he was blowing bubbles on my stomach. His laugh is the best sound I've ever heard! He has 5 teeth: two bottom, three top. I think he's about to get more, because he's been a little fuss bucket the last few days! It's either his teeth or all of those aches and pains from his learning-to-walk falls... Either way, I don't mind too much, because I get to hold him all day, which hasn't happened since he was itty bitty! I love that little guy!

He's figured out how to use the (baby) slide at the playground - he can climb the steps up all by himself, crawl over to the slide, and fling himself down, head first, arms out front like he's flying. He just laughs and laughs - I swear, he's fearless! I put him down at the playground, and off he goes! He doesn't need me at all! It's just amazing to see.

He's so intense when he's learning something, too. So focused. He'll spend forever trying to work something out - the other day he kept trying to put an acorn cap onto a stick. He sat there, still and quiet, for a good five minutes. Grandma taught him how to pick up a toy pig and put it into his tractor, and he just watched and watched and watched her before he tried it, like he was trying to wrap his head around it. He got a barn for Christmas, and the little chicken sits in the nest behind the doors. He knows where that chicken goes, too, because when we were finished playing with it yesterday he put the chicken back in the nest and shut the door, even though it had been a good five minutes since he'd taken the chicken out! He was helping me wipe the floor down yesterday, too - I gave him a rag and he watched me, looked at the rag, looked at me again, and finally figured it out. Such a smart kid! I'm so, so blessed!!

He loves eating oranges. He still nurses to sleep. He has started sitting in my lap - he'll walk on over to me, climb into my lap, turn around, and plop down. It doesn't matter what we're doing - he just likes sitting in my lap. (He sits in Dontae's lap, too - our 110 pound Rottweiler. He'll sit between his two front paws and snuggle back against Dontae's chest, and reach back to pat the dog's head. So cute!). He's getting better about reading, and we can make it though most books without him trying to chew on the pages (the baby, of course, not the dog!). His favorite book now is an animal book that just has pictures of animals you would find on a farm, then in the rainforest, the woods, and the African plains. He'll turn the pages and point to an animal, and I'll tell him what it is and make animal noises. At least to the animals I know - does anyone know what a Sloth sound like? :-) But I do a pretty good job. The pig always makes him laugh, and he also likes the snake (who ssssslithers up and tickles his tummy) and the lion (who rrrrooooaaarrrs and tickles him with his claws).

So anyway - that's the update on my little guy! Thank you to all of you who have been there for us during the past few months! I appreciate all of you, and your love for him is such a blessing in his life (and mine!). We couldn't do it without you! It's amazing how much joy one little person can bring to the world, isn't it?!

Eight Months!!

Okay... I really need to study, but I wanted to take a minute to update everyone on the little man!

He's SO amazing. I am having so, so, so much fun being his mom. I know I say that every time, but it's true! I feel so blessed!

He's crawling up a storm these days. Getting into everything, of course. He lets his opinion be known, too - there's definitely no doubt about what he wants at any given moment! But generally, he's really laid back and content.

Let's see... He loves to eat (surprise, surprise). He loves riding in his little red wagon (he gets to ride in it up to the bunny cage when we feed and water her every day, and he thinks it's loads of fun!). He likes sitting outside on the blanket with Mommy or Nana (whoever's home), but he doesn't like it when the pigs come up and snort in his face, and we have to chase them off with the bathroom plunger (don't ask). He tolerates milking the goats fairly well, especially when he can get a handful of hay from the trash bin - but he knows not to put it into his mouth (he's so smart!). Did I mention he likes to eat? :-)

He loves "walking" (holding onto our hands or furniture), and today I think he used a push-toy to "walk" (that's the first time he's done that!). And the whole time he's "walking" and crawling and playing, he'll just talk and talk and talk to himself. The sounds this kid makes just crack me up!

I took him to the playground a few weeks ago, and he LOVED it! I had so much fun watching him! He didn't need me at all - he was just so content to sit there and watch the other kids, and then crawl around and play. I swear, I've never had so much fun as when he's having fun. What did I do with my life before he came along? (besides sleep and shower and such...)

So that's the quick update. Can you believe it's been eight months?! It's just flown by!! I think it's finally hit me that he's going to be around for a while - I don't have to give him back - I get to keep him! I love that I'm really settled into being his mom now, and I love watching the little person that he's becoming. Anyway - I'll try to get new pictures up (maybe of him in his Halloween costume - he's going to be a pumpkin! I'm so excited!), and I'll write more when I can!

He's Crawling!

It's official: I'll never rest again. He's mobile now, and - let me tell you - he is one busy kid!!

He started crawling last Friday. Nana and I were moving some furniture from room to room, and we'd put him down to play with toys in the living room. When we came in to check on him, he was in a different spot than where we left him (not too far, but far enough!). Nana sat on the floor in front of him and called him over - and here he comes, on his hands and knees, just like the pictures in the baby books!

I cried.

I cried because I was happy (it was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen!), and because I was sad (what happened to my tiny little boy?!).

But, above all, I am so, so proud of him. He is just amazing! Every day I think that he can't get any more wonderful, and that being his mom can't possibly get any better - and every day I'm wrong! I feel like all I've done over the past seven months is fall more and more (and more and more) in love with this kid! I look at him and think "wow - you're mine. I get to keep you!" and I just can't wrap my head around it. I'm somebody's mom...

What is he going to think of me when he's 10? 15? 25? What would it be like to have me for a mother? What is he going to remember fondly from his childhood, and what will he try to forget? Those are questions that I don't let myself ask too often - they make me scared! Instead, I just try to focus on the next thing coming: Which cream do I put on this diaper rash? Should I feed him peaches or pears for breakfast? What is he going to be for halloween? Those are much safer questions!

Okay, that was off topic. But the point is that he is growing up, and it scares the bejeebies out of me!

He's pulling up on everything - pants legs and dogs included. He's learning the word "No" (and doesn't like it!). If we take a toy away, he looks for it, and sometimes cries. He learned to sip from a straw on Saturday (although all he was doing was sipping up the water and letting it all run out of his mouth and back into my glass - but baby spit makes things taste better, right? I really do love being a mom!).

We moved the books into our living room, so we sit and read together a lot (he'll chew on one book while I read another one out loud). He's still mesmerized by the animals, especially the horses. If he's unsure of a situation, he'll look to me for cues - if I smile and look excited, he'll decide that he's okay after all (I try to use that to my advantage when he falls over and cabonks his head, and about half the time I can convince him that it really didn't hurt all that badly). His favorite toys this month have been plastic containers - cups, bowls, spoons - and especially lids. Go figure. The toy of the week is a plastic bag (a thick zip-up plastic bag that comforters come in, not the thin grocery bags). Nana got a balloon for him from the grocery store and that was a big hit, too - he chewed on the ribbon, swatted at the balloon, and ended up getting so excited that he pumped his little arms up and down, causing the balloon to hit him in the head repeatedly.

He's still talking up a storm - lots of "mama"s and "da da da"s. He gets really into whatever it is he's trying to say, and he'll laugh and talk and laugh and talk and raise his hands up in the air, clasp them above his head, smile a HUGE smile, and then crumple over and laugh like he is the funniest person he's ever met. He has just been in the best mood this week - I think mobility agrees with him!

I'll try to get some pictures up soon - you would not believe how big he's getting!

Six Months!!

Wow - I can't believe it's been six months already. SIX MONTHS!! A whole half of a year! (Okay - it isn't exactly six months - we're still a few days shy - but close enough!)

He's gotten so big; so grown up. Sometimes I look at him and just wonder where my little baby went. It's mostly when he laughs. He throws his head back and laughs with his "big boy" laugh. Oh, melt my heart!

He's so close to crawling. I know, as his mother, I should be encouraging his development and all of that, but here's my confession: I really, really, really want him to wait just a *little* while longer before taking this next big step. Sitting up was okay. Drinking from a sippy cup? Way to go! But crawling? Today it's crawling, tomorrow he's going to get married and move to Guam.

Okay, maybe that's a tiny bit overdramatic, but you get the idea!

But seriously, he is so, so close to crawling. He can move in a circle. He can move backward. He can get onto his hands and knees from almost any position, including from laying down or sitting (come to think of it, those are the only positions in his repertoire at the moment!). He gets up on his hands and knees/feet (whichever suits him at the time) and rocks back and forth. He can even move forward, but it's mostly by accident, and still very slow. My only saving grace is that he gets frustrated so quickly, and that gives me an excuse to pick him up. Am I a bad mom or what?

Two weeks ago he was playing with a toy and I picked him up and he actually wanted to get back down to play. Again, just break my heart... What do you mean you want to play with a toy instead of being cuddled by your mom? What a cruel, sad world it is! I guess I just have to kiss him and cuddle him and rock him and tickle him as much as I can now, before he can really tell me what he thinks of it!

He truly is the most delightful person I've ever met. I'm not just making that up, either! His little sense of humor is maturing too - you used to have to tickle him or kiss him or throw him up into the air to make him smile and laugh - now you just have to make faces at him from the other side of the room. Or, in my case, dance like a white girl. He laughs and laughs, like it's the funniest thing he's ever seen (AJ says he's right).

His favorite toys now: A little red shiny gift bag from the dollar store. It crinkles, and has handles, and is now all torn up and wrinkled from hours and hours of use. He also has this big plastic contraption thing with different blocks and mirrors and beads and such that spin around on it - a baby toy that babies actually play with, imagine that!

We've started settling into a routine, too. We eat breakfast (veggies or fruit/rice cereal) before our morning nap. And for bed, we eat dinner (again, veggies or fruit/rice cereal), take a bath, get into our pajamas (you've never seen anything so cute as this kid's fat rolls sticking out between his pajama shirt and shorts!), and go to sleep. No more bouncing and rocking and such to get him to sleep - he's way too heavy now! We just lay down (still in mommy and daddy's bed) and nurse a little and go to sleep. He does so good with it all, I seriously have no complaints.

Wait - I take that back. My one complaint is this: my nipples are sore. He nurses ALL NIGHT LONG. Two days ago I decided that it was enough - the kid is going on a diet. I now wear a shirt to bed, and he has to ask permission before I let him have the boob. This ritual basically consists of him waking up enough to root around in the dark against my T-shirt and making a sound that is half way between a mewing cat and a grunting pig. Again, melt my heart. He can have whatever he wants. God help me when he gets old enough to realize that this is me, wrapped around his little finger.

I'm going to be strong, though. That's what I keep telling myself. One of these days, I'll stop giving in. One of these days...

No wonder happy babies turn into spoiled kids. They're just too sweet when they're happy, and you get into the habit of trying to keep them that way!

I'm trying to think of all the other wonderful things about him, but I would seriously be up all night writing. You'll have to settle for the summary: He's perfect. Wonderful. Amazing. Incredible. Absolutely, and without question, one of the loves of my life (after AJ, of course!). I still, to this day, look at him and just marvel: he's here. He's actually here. I spent my whole life waiting, and now I have him. I'm a mom! I never knew that life could be so wonderful, or that love could feel so complete!

5 Month Update

I can't believe my little man is already 5 months old!! At the same time, it feels like I've been his mom forever...

In my last post I was excited that he finally learned how to jump in his bouncy seat - now he's a little jumping bean!! When you hold him he's always trying to jump and move and wiggle and squirm - it wears me out! :-)

We've been moving over the past few weeks, and he hasn't gotten the attention he's used to. So what does my little ham do? He turns on the charm and has started doing the darndest things for attention! He screams with delight and great enthusiasm; he laughs and smiles whenever you look at him; he blows messy, loud bubbles of spit; and he makes the cutest noises by breathing in slowly and dramatically.

He's sitting up by himself, too! Not that he's reliable (we still put pillows around him for the inevitable tumble), but he's able to sit for LONG periods of time, and even to reach for toys with both hands. A few nights ago I watched as he reached for a toy, grabbed it, brought it up to his mouth, threw it, and reached for it again, all without falling over. It was amazing!!

He LOVES our animals, and could spend hours just watching them. He reaches out for them and "pets" them whenever they walk by. He LOVES people, too, especially when they're paying attention to him. Strangers come up and say hello and he smiles - who would've thought that a kid of mine would be so social?! He likes bath time, being outside, and watching his daddy.

He's started paying attention to not only people, but also things around him: the food on my plate, the duck in the yard, the TV in the corner. He reaches with intent for anything remotely near him. The little toy you hand him just isn't good enough anymore! I can see now how busy he's going to be - I'm tired already, but looking forward to it!

He is just so much fun!! I have the happiest, cutest, smartest, BEST baby boy that has ever lived. And being his mom has made me so much happier than I ever thought one person could be!

He's Growing Up!!

I can't believe what a little man he is! He FINALLY figured out how to jump in his bouncy seat today!! He was jumping on purpose, laughing, jumping, laughing... I hate not holding him all the time, but he's just so happy to sit there and play, I have to make that sacrifice! I sit right there with him, though, and tickled his knees. What if I turn into one of those moms that shows up at his dorm room to make his bed for him? Okay - that's a little extreme - but you know what I mean! I can't stand being without him, even if he's right beside me!

He's starting to recognize certain games and songs, and he gets so worked up. And when I came home today he was so excited (and hungry!) that he started kicking his feet in anticipation. He smiles with his whole body - not just his mouth or his face, but his whole self. It's like his little body is just not big enough to hold how happy he is!!

And his fat, fat, fat!! FAT!! I love it! FULL of fat rolls!! He's what I've always wanted - a BIG, happy baby! It's like the quote I heard today: "God knew exactly which kid I wanted, and that was the one He gave me"!!

We Love Apples!!

We ate our first "solid" food today - organic baby food (apples) mixed with organic whole-grain rice cereal and breastmilk. He LOVED it!! I'll write more later (he's awake and wiggling around in my lap), but I wanted to post this video so you could see his cuteness! Being a mom is way too much fun!! :-)

Update on the J-man!

He is amazing, I'm telling you! I am in awe of how wonderful he is!

He's starting to interact with his environment more and more, each and every day. On Friday we went to our last Kindermusik class and I just started thinking about how much he's grown up during the last ten weeks (he was 3 weeks old when we started)! He couldn't even hold up his own head then, and on Friday he was reaching for the ball and holding his own jingle bells and looking around at everyone, smiling. It's incredible...

It's so much fun watching him discover his hands, and what they do. He doesn't quite have the hang of it, but he's working on it! Yesterday he had managed to grab the top part of his ear and a big handful of his hair, but when he tried to pull his hand away he couldn't figure out how to let go! So he's pulling his own hair as hard as he can, trying to get his hand back, and he's just looking up at me, like he wanted to say, "Help, mom... we have a problem... help, I'm stuck, and my hair hurts! help, what do I do?!" Poor guy, I was laughing so hard I could barely see how to help him!

When he does grab a hold of something, it goes straight to his mouth. Blankets, the occasional toy, even his own fingers. I know every baby does it, but it surprised me at first, to see how much he does it - and I know it will only get worse! It's made me start thinking about babyproofing, and how much harder it's going to be than I thought at first! But one thing at a time, right? :-)

His favorite toy this week is his bouncy exerciser (you can see him in it in a lot of the pictures). He'll sit there and play like it's the most serious thing on earth - you've never seen a CEO concentrate on "work" as much as this little guy does! It's serious business, let me tell you! It's so adorable, watching him concentrate so much on playing. This morning I made coffee and came back in the livingroom to find him toe-painting with his own poop! It had run down his leg and pooled underneath him, and he was skating in it, smearing it all over. But he was happy!! That's all that counts, right? Happy babies and washable floors - I am so glad I don't have carpet. :-)

He talks and talks and talks, too! He's always gurgling and babbling about something. When he's unhappy or bored, it's usually "MMmmaa... Mmm... Mmmm..." I know it's just a sound, but I like hearing it! He's just so much fun. I love being his mommy!

The only downside is that he sleeps ALL THE TIME!! He sleeps and sleeps and sleeps and sleeps, until I'm so excited when he wakes up because I've missed him so much! I get maybe 45 minutes or an hour of Jeremiah time, and then he's tired again. I always nurse him to sleep, which I love. I get to just lay there and cuddle and watch his sleepy little eyes fight to stay open. If I'm tired I nap with him (okay, let's face it, I'm almost always tired!) and we get to just stay under the covers all curled up and happy. AJ, Nana, and Sharon are having a harder time getting him to sleep, though - we're still working on getting him to sleep and keeping him asleep when I'm not home.

But based on how he's been acting the past 2 days, sleeping and eating and sleeping again, I'm thinking he may be getting ready for another growth spurt... Good gracious, we just finished the last one! He's already in 6-9 month clothes - no telling what he'll be wearing at the end of the month! :-)

So that's the update on my little man. He's so happy, I'm beyond happy, and AJ isn't unhappy, so we're all doing good! I can't believe it's been 3 months - I can't even remember what my life was like without him! And I can't wait to see what the next 3 months bring!

Another Dr's Appt

The short summary: He's big.

The longer summary: He's big and smart.

The details: He's doing everything a four month old would do - sitting with support, gurgling and laughing and squealing, starting to reach with his hands - the pediatrician kept saying how "advanced" he was. She used that word four or five times - "advanced". My kid is "advanced". Who'd a thunk? :-)

I did lie and said that he got ten minutes of tummy time every single day (excluding the past three weeks, of course!). She said she could tell he was getting plenty of tummy time (shh.. our little secret, guys!) because he had such good muscle control all over, and because his head was so pretty and round. (Let's not tell her that it's just because he never gets put down!!).

Okay, I'll say it again: My kid's "advanced"!! Wow - that never gets old! :-)

As far as his growth, he's 14 pounds 11 oz (still at the 97th percentile for weight). At least now he's "well proportioned", she said: he's up to 75% for height and head circumference - 23.5 inches long, and his big ole' head came in at 16 inches around.

So that's it: he's big and smart. But we all knew that already, right? :-) I just like going to the doctor's office to show him off! And he was being extra wonderful, if there is such a thing as being more wonderful than usual, and so, so happy. He was laughing and gurgling and playing with the nurse and the doctor both. Like he knows he's cute and smart and he's going to show them just how cute and smart he is! I love that kid!

Bad Day In The Debnam House!

It's a bad day in the Debnam house! Poor Jeremiah is sick, and AJ's truck isn't working! I'm *almost* freaking out about the baby, and AJ is *almost* freaking out about the truck, but we're hanging in. Usually we'd be fighting like cats and dogs by now from the stress, but we haven't even gotten frustrated at one another today! I really think that having Jeremiah has mellowed me - money is just money, nothing more and nothing less - and life is too short! God has also really convicted me about the way I'd been controlling (or trying to, at least!) the marriage, and basically opened my eyes to this very simple truth: that if I didn't want to feel like or be treated like his mother, I shouldn't act like his mother. Groundbreaking, huh? :-)

I really do love and appreciate my husband - he is the best man I know, and I hope Jeremiah will take care of my future daughter-in-law and grandkids as well as his Daddy takes care of us. In the middle of trying to get his truck fixed, AJ took 30 minutes out to watch the baby so I could get some rest. He is so caring and responsive to his family, and still so capable and responsible outside the home, too! I couldn't ask for a better husband.

As for my poor son - he's pitiful! It's so hard to watch him not feel good. I know it's just a cold, but it still breaks my heart! The night before last I noticed he was a little fussier than usual, and he sounded a little stopped up and was having a harder time nursing while laying down, so I thought he might be getting sick, but wasn't sure. It was last night that he started not being able to eat because he was so stopped up. Around 1:00 am, I suctioned out his nose because he was having such a hard time breathing, and got out huge globs of snot. He was whimpering - not really crying - and just wanted to be held upright against my chest. He kept rubbing his face into my neck, like he was trying to make his nose feel better! It was just so sad, not being able to do anything. In the course of an hour or so it just got worse - he started coughing and gagging and sneezing, and he finally threw up (not spit-up, mind you, but actually vomited). The first time he sneezed and snot flew out, it scared him, I think! That had never happened to him before, and he wasn't expecting it! He started shaking his head and kind of yelling "aagh! aagh!" - like he was trying to tell me "something's coming out of my nose, mom! Help! Help! What do I do?!" It would've been funny if it wasn't so sad. It's just amazing to think that something so simple and common as a cold can be such a new and scary experience for a baby!

Today has been a bunch of ups and downs - he's been sleeping a lot, and we've just been hanging out here in the bedroom, taking it easy. He's been nursing okay, not as much as usual, but enough to keep hydrated, and he's only thrown up once today. We have some Cold Remedy herbs from WishGarden Herbs, and it really seems to help. AJ also went out and got us some Little Noses saline spray and some Baby Vicks Rub that's basically an herbal balm without the menthol or whatever the real Vicks Vapor Rub has in it. Whenever he's awake I basically hold him and cuddle him and do what I can to make it better (which isn't much! Poor little guy!), and when he falls asleep I put him on the Boppy, so his head is elevated a little to help him breath. He's been a little trooper, though - I think I feel worse than he does about it!

I feel absolutely irrational about this - I know it's just a cold... But it feels like such a big deal! I'm probably overreacting, but I don't care! He's the whole world to me, and he doesn't feel good - I honestly didn't anticipate what that would do to my poor mommy nerves.

So Much Fun!!

It is SO MUCH FUN being a mom!! It's all so wonderful : That first moment he wakes up in the morning and gives me those first precious smiles... When he's so tired and ready for a nap, but he doesn't want to give in and go to sleep, and he makes those little "ahhhh ahhhh ahhhh" noises that just make my heart split right in two... The way he takes in the world around him, all bright-eyed and so trusting... How he lays his head down on my shoulder and snuggles in so close... The way he frantically looks for the nipple like he's going to starve to death, and when he finds it he gulps and gulps and gulps while his eyelids droop down in pure bliss... The way he curlers up next to me at night, so close - and it makes me feel like I'm doing a good job, because I know he feels safe and loved. Everything is so perfect, and I've never been so happy. I knew that being a mom would be amazing, I just didn't know what 'amazing' meant until this!

Weekly Update

Hey everybody! Sorry there hasn't been much new info up over the last week or so - it's hard to find time to eat dinner every night, much less get on the computer! Jeremiah's sleeping now, so I thought I'd take a minute to brag about my baby! :-)

So here it goes: he is amazing! He's been alert & happy this week. His favorite thing now is his bumbo chair (unsure of what that is? check out the link at the bottom of this post). He just LOVES it! He loves learning new things, and "sitting" in his chair or in our laps or on the couch (propped up against the arm rest) keeps him occupied for what feels like hours (more like twenty minutes, at most!). He's just learning so much, each and every day.

He's "talking" now - babbling and cooing and grunting and laughing. He smiles all the time, and he even has this cute little dimple, a little under the center of his right cheek. He's fat, fat, fat - even the 6-9 month socks cut lines into his fat little legs! He's so fat that we're having a hard time keeping the fat rolls around his neck clean - the creases started to get a little red this week, so we've been trying to keep baby powder on it. His little bottom looks good though - we haven't had any problems at all with diaper rash, and I think it's partly because of the cloth diapers, and partly because we just enjoy changing his diaper so much! :-)

I started letting him "swim" in the bathtub this week, too. He has so much fun! I get in with him and let the water fill up the tub. Sometimes I keep him on his bath sling, and let him kick around and play, and other times I just hold him and let him float around. It's so great to see his little mind working. The first time I put him in the tub he started kicking, and when the water splashed over him he stopped and looked around, and kicked again, and stopped to look... He can feel the water moving around him, and is starting to figure out that he's the one making it move. So neat!

(Here's a link to the bumbo seat. It supports him so he can sit in it without falling over: http://www.target.com/Bumbo-Baby-Sitter-Green/dp/B000ZHJOIW/sr=1-1/qid=1209092423/ref=sr_1_1/601-0016346-0428176?ie=UTF8&index=target&rh=k%3Abumbo&page=1)

Developmental Updates

I have to get some new pictures up - this one's old, but it's still one of my favorites!

I can't believe how much he's changing, and so fast! It's so funny how it happens, too - it's like overnight he develops two or three new skills, and then for another few days or weeks, nothing. And just when I start to get worried that he's not "on track", he surprises me with a sudden surge of development! I think it's wonderful how babies develop all on their own time, instead of following a book. AJ is always telling me that the baby hasn't read the book, so it's not fair to hold him to it!

And Jeremiah's doing so good with everything!! He hold his head up like a champ, and during tummy time he can support his upper body weight on his arms for a good two minutes (probably longer if he didn't get bored!).

Yesterday I went to dinner with my husband. He had Jeremiah sitting on the table, kind of leaning back against him, and I just noticed how big my kid is getting! Not physically big (which he is!), but growing-up big. He was just sitting there, all on his own - okay, leaning on AJ and all squished down around the middle, but still! - looking around at everything. He was babbling, and moving his hands around, and just entertaining himself. When he caught sight of me, he smiled. He could bring his hands up to his mouth and gum at them. He really is growing up!!

I think back to when he was little (you know, a whole eight weeks ago when he was born), and all of his movements were reflexive. It's a big deal that he's able to choose to move his own arms now, and not only that, but his coordination has gotten better, so instead of hitting himself repeatedly upside the head (like he was doing last week - so cute!), he's able to actually find his mouth with them. And he's almost sitting with support - he's so, so, so close - I guess you could say he is sitting with support, he's just not very good at it yet!

His communication has gotten so much better, too. He coos and grunts, and the other day he actually said a consonant sound ("MMmma"), which was amazing! Okay, I know it was by accident, but still! He also has this fake cry now when he wants to be picked up. Nothing in the world is wrong with him - he just knows what he wants and knows how to communicate it so that he'll get it! Mommy thinks it's cute and isn't swayed in the least - Daddy, on the other hand, just hears crying and thinks it's an emergency. Jeremiah has you right where he wants you, AJ! :-)

I also love how he's anticipating certain actions now. When we lay down at night, he knows it's time for bed, and goes to sleep. When we get up in the morning, we always go to the living room and put on some kid music and he just lays there completely naked (he LOVES it!!), and then once I've let the dogs out and made coffee and all of that, I come back and give him a baby massage. The other day when I was laying out the waterproof pad on the floor, he started to get so excited! He was smiling and almost shaking, he was so happy, because he knew what was coming. I love that he's putting all of that together in his little brain.

One last thing - an update on his smiles. I figured out why everyone else got so many more smiles than I did. It was because I always scared him when he smiled at me! I'd get so excited that I'd overreact, and squeal or cry or hug him or something. So I've worked really hard not to do those things, and wouldn't you know, he smiles at me all the time now!! Don't tell him this, but it still makes my heart skip a beat or two. I never knew I could be so happy, or feel so much!

Dr's Appointment

Jeremiah had a doctor's appointment today. It was so much better than last time!! At his two week visit I cried - they acted like I was some crack-head mom that wasn't taking care of him. When I said I'd had a home birth, they actually responded with, "Oh, so he hasn't had any care since then?" What a horrible thing to say to a new mom! Like I've just kept him in a closet for the past ten days - of course he's had care - I'd done nothing but care for him! And besides, our midwife had seen him not just at birth, but at three days, five days, eight days, and ten days, along with answering all of our questions the ten or fifteen times we'd called!

Anyway, like I was saying - today went so much better! The staff at this new pediatrician office was WONDERFUL - everyone from the nurse who did the measurements to the PA-C who saw him - they were all so nice and warm and encouraging.

So here's the news with the J-man:
*He weighed in at 13.9 pounds - 3.9 lbs heavier than he was seven & a half weeks ago!
*His head grew an entire inch - it went from 14.5 inches to 15.5
*He also grew an inch "taller" - he's now 22 inches long
*He's at the 97th percentile for weight, but only 33% for length! He's short & fat!!

As for developmental milestones, he's doing GREAT!! His head control is excellent, she said (she actually mentioned it a few times, so I'd like to think that it's exceptional for his age - but that could just be the mommy in me talking!), and he's right on cue with smiling and moving his arms and legs. And during tummy time, he's holding himself up so much better than he should be for this age! I'm proud of him, but I'm also proud of me (and everyone else that has been influencing his life), because we've been doing such a great job giving him the best start we can!

So that's the news from his doctor's appointment! He's basically one happy, healthy, fat little kid! And I am one happy, blessed, and grateful mom! I love my little man!!